Why we should give compliments that aren’t based on appearance

How good do you feel when you receive a compliment? You may feel awkward, you may feel flattered, and it can help to boost your mood. Giving compliments and seeing them put a smile on someone’s face is also rewarding. However, there’s a reason why we shouldn’t only be giving appearance-based compliments.

Celebrate all of the wonderful qualities that make people unique

For a surprisingly small gesture, compliments can have a significant impact. Compliments are free, quick and an easy way of making someone’s day a little brighter. But have you ever noticed how many appearance-based ones there are? For instance, we are too quick to comment on someone’s body or their looks. How often do we take the time to tell someone just how much we appreciate them?

We do not have partners, family and friends in our life because they look good in jeans or have a great shoe collection. It’s for their sense of humour, perseverance and strength. What things are they good at? How do they treat others?

So, what’s the problem with appearance-based compliments?

Giving comments based on appearance, looks or weight reinforces the idea that we are only as good as our physical attributes. Similarly, Giving someone a compliment based on an unimportant part of who they are can be insulting. By constantly ignoring intelligence or compassion, for example, we reinforce the thought that nothing else matters.

Plus, if all you ever get is an exterior compliment, those you get that are different will probably be remembered.

Our importance neither starts nor ends with our appearance

We should never feel like we need to change ourselves or how we dress etc, to gain approval. Nor should we feel like approval is there to be gained by strangers in the first place. Therefore, it is essential to focus on the other beautiful attributes. Giving alternative compliments to yourself and others, we kickstart the conversation to look towards the parts that really matter.

How to compliment someone without mentioning weight or appearance

It is wise to look beyond bodies and start praising people on things other than their appearance. Here are some compliment ideas:

1. You’re such a strong person
2. You are so much fun
3. You make me feel less alone
4. You’re really good at…
5. I can always count on you for motivation
6. You look so happy
7. I always look forward to seeing you
8. You make me feel at ease
9. You really inspire me
10. I really appreciate you as a friend
11. You bring out the best in me
12. You’re great to talk to
13. You take the time to listen to me
14. You always make me laugh
15. I’m lucky to know you
16. You are so kind
17. I love how confident you are
18. You’re a great person to depend on
19. I love your creativity
20. I admire your resilience
21. You’re such a good friend
22. I appreciate you always being there for me
23. You make the world a better place
24. You are such a great leader
25. When I’m feeling down, I know I can turn to you
26. I admire your independence 
27. You are always so thoughtful with gifts
28. The world would be a better place if more people were like you
29. You may not get the praise you deserve, but I see your talent
30. You are empowering 
31. Whenever I’m around you, I feel like I can conquer the world
32. I love how down to earth you are
33. I always feel like I can be myself around you
34. You have a rare way of connecting with other
35. You made my day

Here’s to giving amazing compliments and helping ourselves. Self-care is so important. Remember, we have so much more to offer the world than how we look. Letting someone know you’re thinking of them can be a big compliment in itself. Let go, and give more than appearance-based compliments.

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